Anger Management To Stop Being So Angry
Are you angry? Perhaps there is something specific that is niggling away inside and triggers all that mess of angry thoughts and feelings? Or maybe you just seem to have become an angry person, like all that emotion has built up inside and you have to let it out somehow?
Many people talk about anger management as if it is good to let it all out, if that somehow will diffuse feeling angry and be the end of it forever. Yet, just like most things, being angry can become a habit that starts to create cracks in friendships and relationships and can become like a seeping wound oozing into your life.
If you (and maybe everyone else) are sick of feeling angry then check out the anger management tips below.
How To Stop Being So Angry
Becoming angry easily may seem like second nature at the moment. You may take it out on others with shouting, sulking or picking at what they say and do. Or maybe you have learnt to kick or throw things when those angry feelings get too much. Or maybe you feel like you have built up a reservoir of anger inside and everyone and everything seem determined to get at you in some way every day.
And if you are reading this right now then it’s just possible that all that anger has reached the level where it’s causing problems.
Those problems from being angry may be in relationships and friendships and perhaps others are fed up of being on edge around you or of the cycle of arguments and then remorse. Or maybe feeling angry has led to conflict and issues at work and in other areas of your life. And maybe you are just sick of feeling angry all the time and trying to live with it.
If you could do with some effective anger management techniques then start using these tips from today and implement them consistently:
1) What Makes You Angry?
Anger can become habitual and seem automatic yet it will nearly always have a ‘trigger’ that fires that anger into action. Spend some time (with supportive partners/friends if it helps you) to identify those triggers and what it is about those moments that fire up your angry response. Only then can you start to actively plan how to diffuse those triggers and respond in a more constructive, healthier way.
2) Use Your Thinking
Emotions are there for us to take action of some sort – you breathe faster, your heart races, you get hot, adrenaline shoots through you and your angry emotions try to make you find a release.
So start using your thinking instead of your emotions. As soon as you start to approach a trigger person or situation, or at the first sign of anger, start counting backwards from three hundred in units of three in your head. This puts the logical, clear thinking part of your brain in charge and dampens those angry emotions you used to have at those times.
3) Use Your Thinking Some More
As mentioned, emotions are for action so actively pause, stop and think. Give yourself ‘breathing time’ to let the emotions calm down and then decide on your response instead of just wading in as a mess of angry thoughts and feelings, only to have to repair the damage later.
You’ve probably been told before to take a few deep breaths to feel calmer. Yet, depending on how you carried that out, it may not have helped too much.
What you do need to do is breathe and do it like this when you start feeling angry or better still, do it regularly to feel calm and in control more naturally generally: hold your breath for 5 seconds, then breathe out for a mental count of 11 and in for a mental count of 7. Keep repeating making sure that the out breath is longer and you will soon be feeling calmer and thinking more clearly.
5) Plan For Success
Instead of letting anger rule the roost, start learning how to feel calm and use your mind to imagine being calm and in control in those moments where you used to be angry.
Every day take time to deeply relax (using my free relaxation audio) and vivildy imagine being calm, balanced and in control in those situations and around those people. This will teach your mind to start reacting more calmly, more naturally, in the future. Result!
Anger Management Help
Of course there are many other ways to evaporate all that anger and programme your mind to be calm and in control. If you could use some more personal anger management help then get in touch and ask to book your free consultation. You too could soon be one of those people who don’t let the little things bother you and who seems to enjoy life more – just imagine how good that would feel.
To your success,
Anger Management Ely & Newmarket
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