Help For Shy Bladder Syndrome – Hypnotherapy in Ely and Newmarket

Shy bladder syndrome, also known as paruresis, is an anxiety issue where you find yourself unable to urinate when there are other people there.

At home you’ll be totally fine, but in social settings, where other people can be there, it all becomes an anxious, stressful struggle. You need to pee, you go into the toilet and if there are others there, you simply can’t. If no one else happens to be there you can go fine. If it is a single, sole person toilet, you’ll be fine. Yet when others are there, it’s like your body freezes. You know you need to urinate but you either have to leave or you have to bide your time until other people have gone, while hoping no one else arrives (which may be impossible in busy places).

For some with shy bladder syndrome, the anxiety is only mild and can be managed. For others the use of public toilets is a constant challenge. You may find yourself watching to check if the toilet is likely to be empty of other people or checking the toilet locations beforehand. The fear of not being able to urinate when others are around can mean you just find it easier to avoid some social situations altogether.

As with all types of anxiety, there are the anxious thoughts and feelings that you have if you are in a situation where you can’t urinate in front of others, despite desperately needing to go. And then there is the anxious anticipation that you may find yourself in a future situation where you may need to go but can’t.

Shy bladder syndrome is a relatively common anxiety issue and one that I have helped many people to overcome. It can strike for men at urinals when someone else is also there, and it can apply to anyone in a public toilet cubicle if someone else is in the room.

What is Shy Bladder Syndrome?

Shy bladder syndrome (paruesis) is a type of social anxiety disorder. Your anxiety around urinating when other people can see or hear you prevents you from going. When no one is there or you are on your own then all is fine. You know it isn’t biological and that just adds to your frustration. Sometimes, with a bit of time, you may be able to wait and make yourself relaxed enough to pee. However, the whole thing is filled with anxiety, worry and stress. Sometimes, your anxiety is so great that you can’t go at all, even though you know you need to.

Urinating when others are about is an ongoing struggle. Public toilets are a problem and even the idea that someone is nearby can be an anxiety trigger. It’s an anxious, persistent pattern that can impact upon your daily life, travel, work and relationships.

With shy bladder syndrome, you will be used to needing to urinate only to find that you get to the urinal or toilet and freeze up. You may feel anxious and dread needing to use a public toilet in case there is anyone else there. You feel tense, hot and uncomfortable as you try to urinate and, if others are there, your mind can race as you try to act like everything is fine. You’ll worry about others noticing and judging you and, when in social situations, you’ll be overthinking about whether and when you can go to the toilet safely.

Some people avoid public toilets altogether or find themselves having to ‘hold it in’ for uncomfortable period of time (which can bring worries about not being able to do so). You might only go to social occasions if they are at places you know will be safe and okay for you. And when out, your entire experience can be dominated by anxious thoughts and feelings around going to the toilet.

Shy bladder syndrome is a form of anxiety that tends to arise after a negative experience around using a public toilet. Whether something specific happened or you were just extremely anxious in the toilet, your brain associates urinating when others are around as a form of threat. It’s not a physical issue with urinating, because you are fine when alone or somewhere you feel safe. Instead it is the anxious thoughts and feelings, the sense of pressure, the need to perform and the fear of being judged that maintain and perpetuate the issue.

When your brain perceives a threat, whether real or imagined, your body enters not the fight or flight mode in order to quickly respond to the danger. Bodily functions that are not essential for survival, such as urination, gets put on hold. In evolutionary terms this makes sense as we needed all our energy and resources to deal with external threats that would harm us. However, your brain responds in the same way to a perceived threat in your own thinking as it would to an actual, external threat. Your body simply won’t let you urinate whilst you are in this state of high anxiety.

Overcoming The Anxiety

No matter how long you have struggled with shy bladder syndrome, or how intense and ingrained the anxiety feels, it is possible to overcome the anxiety. Hypnotherapy for shy bladder syndrome can help you to be able to calm anxious feelings and interrupt negative thought patterns. Rather than feeling dread as you anticipate situations, you will feel calm and in control, knowing you can handle it. Whether there are others there or not, you can relax in public toilets and urinate just like you would at home.

Rather than anxiety, fear and frustration, you can start feeling calm, confident and in control. The more relaxed you become, the more your natural bodily process to urinate can easily happen in public toilets whether anyone else is around or not. Your brain learns not to consider these situations as being a threat (which you already know logically they are not).

As with all types of anxiety, hypnotherapy has a strong evidence base for it’s effectiveness as a treatment. You can overcome the anxiety, regain calmness and control and enjoy the freedom to live your life without anxiety around bathroom situations.

To your health and happiness, 

Dan Regan

Anxiety Hypnotherapist in Ely & Newmarket

Need help to calm anxiety and overcome shy bladder syndrome? Struggling with anxiety, stress, worry and fear and need some help? Find out how I can help with a Complimentary Hypnotherapy Strategy Session. Learn more here: Appointments

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