Last weekend I took my children to watch the latest Disney film called 'Zootropolis' at the cinema.

If you've never heard of it, Zootropolis is based around a city where animals of all shapes and sizes live side by side. From elephants and rhinos to mice and lemmings, the animals live in a city, performing every day job and roles (in a world where humans don't exist). My kids and us grown ups thoroughly enjoyed the movie.

So what has this to do with self esteem and being judged (or the fear of what other people think)?

Low Self Esteem and Worry About What Others Think

In Zootropolis, much like in our own world, animals of all types are often plagued with limiting beliefs and prejudice.

And if you still don't know what I'm talking about, you can check out the film trailer here:

In the film, Judy Hopps becomes the first rabbit to join the police force. To do so she has to overcome and persist through many negative messages and the limiting beliefs that come from those around her - things along the lines of  'you can't do that', 'it's never been done before', and 'you should just settle for how things are now' and so forth.

Ever encountered someone trying to 'push' their limited views of what is possible onto you?

And then, in the city of Zootropolis itself, prejudice and stereotypical views persist - rabbits are considered by some to be weak, mild and stupid, and foxes to be sly and not to be trusted etc. In the face of this, it can be easy to slip into performing that role, worn down by the battle to consistently prove things are otherwise.

zootropolis self esteem hypnotherapy in ely

(My girls excitedly waiting to watch the film!)

And the thing is, much like in our world, often these lazy, generalised views persist. How often is someone still judged because of their background, nationality, race, education and a million other reasons without actually dealing with the individual person?

Every day in my hypnosis work, I encounter people who struggle with low self esteem and the fear of being judged and we work together to resolve this so they can be happy and successful.

Low Self Esteem

Sometimes the roots of low self esteem lie in the past - that doesn't mean we have to spend hours wading through it as we want to resolve how that low self esteem keeps itself going from now as it is no longer an issue.

Often people will tell me how their parents, teachers, siblings etc would criticise them, call them stupid, tell them they wouldn't amount to much or that they were not good enough. And bit by bit, it's like the life is sucked out of the person hearing this until they become a shell of the person they were or could be.

At some point you may adopt that suggestion you have been repeatedly fed as your own. You may consider yourself not good enough, not worthy or perhaps that you don't deserve to succeed or be happy. You may be very self critical and worry about being judged in some negative way or about what other people think about you.

So outside of coming to work with me, how can you start to erode those thoughts and feelings of low self esteem?

1) Notice your self talk: we talk to ourselves or run an internal comentary every waking moment yet often we just go along with whatever comes into our head or we don't even notice we are doing it. Next time you find yourself doubting yourself, worrying about what others think or being self critical - STOP. Literally pause with that thought and write it down. Start to notice what you are suggesting to yourself all day long and whether it is even your voice or something from someone else. Then start to assess whether that thought supports and guides you or whether it just shuts you down and leads you to withdraw. Make it a habit to notice those thoughts and then guide them to something more comfortable and realistic.

self esteem hypnotherapy in ely and newmarket

2) What You Do Well: with low self esteem it can be easy to just notice everything you think you do wrong in a skewed way - giving weight to the negative and brushing past anything positive. So start creating a list that you can add to every day - list successess and achievements, list things you do well, note down compliments you have received and other moments where you have felt good. This starts to balance the picture. There may be areas you still would like to work on and improve and instead of writing off the whole picture of your life, start to recognise that you are adding touches and improvements.

3) Stop worrying what others think: Firstly stop mind reading, that is, stop assuming or guessing that you know what someone else is thinking. They may be thinking something completely different, or more likely, be so wrapped up in their own thoughts that they aren't thinking about anything like what you have guessed. Accept that some people may have thoughts about you, yet anything they think is down to them - there is nothing you can do about it and remember it is merely their view and perception and not necessarily fact or even accurate. And finally, if you find yourself overly concerned about what others are thinking about you, take time to relax and, as you think about those things, imgine a big sign in your mind that says 'so what?' - because so what if they think whatever: you weren't put on this planet to spend your time pleasing others or worrying about their thoughts. So go and do something that makes you feel happy, alive and uplifted...now.

Overcome low self esteem

Having low self esteem definitely doesn't need to be something that you carry around like a burden for your entire life. In fact, in a very short space of time you can start to feel lighter, more clear minded and happier. When you are no longer criticising yourself or wasting time and energy guessing what other people think, you can start to get on with your own life, feeling easier and being happy.

Dan Regan

Hypnotherapy in Ely & Newmarket

Confidence and Self Esteem Help

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