I help a lot of people who have low self esteem and confidence to learn how to feel better in themselves - to become comfortable being who they are.

So it was no surprise to come across a recent Daily Mail article with the headline, 'How having a facelift can make you feel worse. Some patients who appeared up to nine years younger after surgery said their confidence didn't increase.'

The article goes on to mention research that says that having a facelift doesn't necessarily boost self esteem and can even leave you feeling worse (not to mention financially poorer).

Which supports the obvious conclusion that self esteem is more than skin deep. So what exactly is this elusive self esteem that people are often seeking?

What is Self Esteem?

As the research shows, self esteem and confidence aren't just about how young you look or what's on the outside. Although that's not to say that making a positive change like having a make-over, getting leaner and fitter at the gym or buying a new outfit won't give you a confidence boost for a while.

Yet to have and enjoy healthy self esteem through your life takes a bit more than that.

self esteem hypnotherapy in ely

And this isn't exactly a new idea. Maxwell Maltz, an American cosmetic surgeon, reported a similar thing back in the 1960s. His view, having noticed that successful cosmetic surgery didn't necessarily lead to feeling confident, was that a person needed a positive self image otherwise limiting self beliefs would just continue and a person wouldn't succeed in their goals.

Healthy Self Esteem

People with low self esteem tend to have a low opinion of themselves - they may consider that they aren't good enough or worthy or don't deserve to be happy and successful. They can be very self critical and assume everything that goes wrong is their fault.

By contrast, healthy self esteem is about recognising your worth, knowing that you have skills, abilities and valuing yourself. Some people describe it as feeling at peace with being themselves, even if you have areas of your life that you know you can improve and strengthen. It can also be about not taking everything personally and being ok with the fact that other people may have different opinions and views to you , but that doesn't make your opionion any less valid or valuable. 

Increasing Self Esteem

In a future article I'll discuss some ways you can increase your self esteem (without plastic surgery!).

Yet for now just start to become more at ease with yourself. Start to notice your successes, the things you are most grateful for, the things you value the most about yourself and your life and tell yourself that right now, you are doing ok (becasue as they say in the advert - you're worth it).

And if you need any help to increase self esteem please do get in touch and come for your free initial consutlation.

Dan Regan

Hypnotherapy in Ely & Newmarket

www.danreganhypnotherapy.co.uk/issues/confidence  

 

The Daily Mail article appeared on 30 October 2015: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-3296065/How-having-facelift-make-feel-worse-patients-appeared-nine-years-younger-surgery-said-confidence-didn-t-increase.html